The Sun and the Wind | Sick of Trying So Hard?
Are you sick of trying so hard? May I ask, “Are You Being the Sun or the Wind?”
Question: “Andrea, when you’re trying to sell something to someone, I know it’s important to communicate with people more than once. I’ve already emailed my newsletter readers with four different offers this month, but they still aren’t buying. What should I write in my next email that will work? I’m tired of pounding them so many times.”
Answer: There are many ways to answer this question, but with thanks to Aesop, I’d like to paraphrase a little story. It may give you a new perspective on this as well as other situations where you feel like you’re trying awfully hard. Play along for just a moment and see if you can find the energy of this little tale:
The Sun and the Wind decided to have a little game. They agreed to prove which one of them was more powerful.
When a man came traveling down the road, they seized their opportunity – they decided to see who could make the man remove his coat, thus proving whether the Sun or the Wind was the more powerful.
The Wind took the challenge and began to blow. He blew as hard as he could at the man, trying to get him to remove his coat.
But the more the wind blew, the more the man clung to his coat and hat, and the wind had to give up.
Next the sun gave it a try and turned up his rays so it began to warm up. As the day grew brighter and the man grew warmer, he naturally found it too hot to keep his coat on and was happy to take it off.
Coming up on a small stream, he even took his shoes and socks off and took a wade before he continued on his journey.
Now with this story as a backdrop, let’s get back to the questions that make this ‘real.’
“How do I stop chasing after customers and get them to try (or buy) my stuff?”
“How do I stop trying so hard to get results?”
As your e-coach for the moment, may I ask:
Between the wind and the sun, which would you rather be, as you pursue the natural, effortless, stress-free growth of your business?
In what way might you be stepping on the gas in your business, only to spin your wheels?
What seems to take an awfully LONG time to do in your business?
How often do you feel as if “I should” or “I must” in your business? When, exactly?
If you could make your own rules, what would you stop doing?
Hint: Whether you feel as though you ‘get’ the idea behind the Sun and the Wind, take your time with it. We’re taking about a shift in the order of a sea change here and it doesn’t usually happen overnight…
Remember: You can’t get anything wrong and you’ll never be completely finished with your work. Post your comments and questions on this topic at this link:
-
Email this post to a friend.
Posted to: Beyond...| Meaning...| Online Business
April 20th, 2007 at 5:13 pm
It is Friday… and in Calgary the sun is gone! Sniff. Sniff! It is SNOW DAYS!
But, you are the Sunshine of my life today.
Maybe if I ask myself, as I start my day, “How can I be the sun in lives of people” I will get inspiration and answers.
If April brings snow, Then May brings Little Miss Sunshine!
Peace, Lyle
April 21st, 2007 at 1:43 am
Thanks for this Andrea,
I love that fable of the sun and the wind anyway, and it fits well with us as coaches, both for ourselves and our clients.
I enjoyed your questions too, very thought provoking.
It’s inspired me to write a new article on throwing out the rulebook as we create, stop being tied down by the limits of what we think others we “should” be doing.
Thanks again,
Best wishes, Dan.
April 22nd, 2007 at 8:49 pm
Andrea, this is a great story to get me thinking about my attraction ability.
Wind is certainly not attractive as it causes people to guard themselves closely. Certainly sounds like a “hard sell” technique!…..not attractive.
When my sun (soul) is shining brightly in my work, I am so attractive that the problem of attracting clients/customers is no longer a problem. (not a straight analogy to getting “warmed up” by the sun), but it makes a statement to me.
As I get more and more on target with what my market needs/wants/buys, my energy will shine more and more brightly on my potential clients/customers!
April 23rd, 2007 at 7:00 am
Andrea, I love this fable… and relating it to growing a business - genius
I just couldn’t help but think that the wind, reminds me of someone shouting their sales message at their niche; or creating something that they think their niche wants and then trying like mad to get them to buy it.
The sun, on the other hand, reminds me of someone who asks their niche what their challenges are, and then delivers exactly what they need.
I love being the sun for my potential clients
May 1st, 2007 at 11:05 pm
Hello to all - Lyle, Dan, Jenn and Suzanne
I just love it when a good oldie gets dusted off in a new treatment and it’s even more fun when others enjoy it too. I feel as if the fable is like a ’sun’ in and of itself - it warms me up to remember what I knew - forcing things just doesn’t cut it!
Thanks for sharing and going the way of the sun, each of you. Shine on!
May 20th, 2007 at 8:15 am
Seems like all you people in the frigid zone are convinced that it is “better” to be the sun and shining through is the easier more soulful way to go. I notice that Andrea says think about it a while and sea changes. Well.. as I look out to sea (literally) it is very hot here in the Virgin Islands where I live and coach. A wind would be so welcome. It would wake me up and feel so refreshing. I just took my dogs for a walk and found a spot where the wind had a clear channel and I stood there and delighted in feeling its coolness. I think being the wind or the sun depends on what you’re up to, where you are and most importantly on what kind of experience you are trying to allow/create for your clients and yourself. I do love your posts Andrea. They always make me think, smile and then do something different.
Thank you.
June 24th, 2008 at 11:29 am
I’m the stream…living, being, experiencing just what/who I am, and for those who happen by, see what miracles/relief/insights can be shared.
Thanks for the reminder.
Sherri
October 12th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
I think it is neither one nor the other which is the way we as humans have come to think about things. One has to be right and one has to be wrong. I believe we need to become wiser and see that both contribute to something valuable. There is a reason why the Sun and Wind exist. (Not to mention the other elements!
) We need to be more integrative in our thinking. It is actually both the wind and the sun that will create the best value, guidance and support for ourselves, our families and our clients. The sun creates a fertile ground, a place where our best selves can come forth to engage our clients’ minds. It creates a space in which we can collaborate and walk beside our clients to find out what they need and what their barriers are to fulfilling their goals…whatever they may be. Once their decision has been made, sometimes they need a bit of help to build momentum to move forward and staying moving. That’s where the wind comes in. It doesn’t have to be a gale force either! It can be a gentle wind. Just enough to help them get going, to spark something in their minds to take the first step but not to take over stepping out for them! This is how I see it and how I serve my leadership coaching clients and those who seek me out for career coaching. It’s all about integrating and becoming wise in how that’s done for each person.