Collaboration: The Lessons I (Most) Hope We Taught

Over the course of 2 days focused on Collaboration, we shared a lot, and particularly emphasized ‘how-to’ steps. But truth be told, I’m an even bigger fan of some of the more intangible lessons. Because if the inner work isn’t done, your business-building foundation hasn’t yet ‘set’ properly – and no amount of ‘what to do’ will help.

So here are the lessons I ***most*** hope we taught at the Power of Collaboration SuperConference. For those who attended…which one(s) hit closest to home?

(1) Have separate lists for practical to dos and juicy ideas.

This can’t be overemphasized, simple as it may seem. As an entrepreneur, you are by nature, a creative force to be reckoned with.

And if you don’t follow this advice, sooner or later you will have to reckon with yourself. That is, you will start to suffer (burn out, get resentful, piss off your loved ones, or just freeze in complete overwhelm) under the weight of all your great ideas.

Solution: Be crystal clear. Ideas are great! You don’t want to turn off that natural, boundless energy. Just put them in their place. And judiciously and conscientiously select from your idea bucket to feed your active ‘to do’ list.

(2) When you’re thinking about exactly what to say to a potential collaborator to get that magic ‘yes,’ less is more. In fact, less is so much more than more, it’s ridiculous.

When you are building a relationship with a new person, whether it’s in your personal life or more specifically in the form of new joint venture partnerships for your business…go easy.

Like the character in the movie ‘American Pie,’ it’s not hard to slip into verbal diarrhea and give way too much information. (“And this one time, at band camp…”) Instead, dial it down. Think in terms of providing just enough information to get a response like this: “Okay, you have me intrigued, go on.”

The most successful joint venture proposals I’ve made have always been super, super light. “What would you think of XYZ? It’d require an hour of your time and you’d reap the benefits for an indefinite amount of time. I’d do the rest of the work.” Notice how a lot of details are actually missing here. But the key things are present. The major benefit and the amount of investment on the part of your potential partner.

In fact, the very lightness of your proposal bodes well for you in the eyes of the proposee (word?) Too much information doesn’t get you anywhere. In fact, it can hurt you. That’s why, I say again, “Less is more. Less so much more than more, it’s ridiculous.”

(3) In the very best of collaborations, every party should come away thinking they got the best part of the deal.
My Co-Presenter Milana Leshinsky brought this point home so very elegantly. Although scientifically speaking, it may be impossible for everyone to feel like they got the long end of the stick, in a very real way, it can be done.

For example, in the partnership Milana, Michael Port and I formed to create the Collaboration Conference, we each got very different, valuable things.

(4) You have to be able to talk about the money.

The segments on money at the Conference were among the *most* talked about. The most extended (due to lots of questions from attendees). And the most inquired about after the conference – “I like the formula Andrea, but what do I do when…”

Although the ferocity of the response surprised me at first, it makes sense. If you can’t talk about the money part of joint ventures, they won’t work. You can propose a (brief) wonderful idea, and the partner might bite, but you have to be able to clear-headedly know how to navigate the ‘how do we split the money’ conversation.

If you can’t, I’d suggest you don’t try to joint venture until you can. Once you can, it’s a huge relief and frees up a whole lot of energy. The nice thing is, once you know the formula (and the exceptions), talking about the money can be easy. So make sure you think about the money conversation, sooner rather than later.

(5) In our world of access to intimacy, even with strangers, being inconsiderate is inexcusable.

My other Co-Presenter Michael Port gave a great example of this. After months of preparation for the launch of his new book, he and his team had achieved the mountaintop. The launch was a phenomenal success.

So what did someone – basically a stranger – do the day after the big launch? They wrote a lengthy email to Michael proposing a big project. Now when I say lengthy, I mean lengthy – I saw the email on Michael’s phone – dense paragraphs of text, etc.

Michael said a few things about this at the event, but here’s what I can add. If you want to build a relationship with me and perhaps create something together that supports both of our businesses – don’t give me something heavy to lift the day after I’ve completed something big. It’s inconsiderate.

Solution? Relate. Relate to your potential partners as real people with real lives. Look for opportunities to build real relationships. How about a congratulations note to Michael, plain and simple? Read blogs, newsletters and the acknowledgements section of boks. Listen to podcasts, attend free calls. Enter the stream of conversation that’s going on, and *then* decide how to approach the person.

Remember, the best, most profitable and most meaningful joint ventures occur when two or more businesses on their chosen course, intersect, like two streets crossing each other. The intersection is where the cool stuff happens – all parties benefit.

Don’t try to go through an intersection if it’s closed for the moment doing repairs or opening up a few extra lanes.

(6) Receiving is still the biggest obstacle to most business owner’s success, bar none.

In a certain sense, the agenda of the event was designed to maximize the element of ‘receiving.’ Some people felt there could have been even more, and I agree.

That said…there was still a goodly number of participants who subconsciously, for the most part, were saying ‘no’ to the help that was seeking them. I’ve said so much about this lately, I’ll leave it at this:

How are you saying no to help in your business, today?

Just don’t let the brevity of this point make you think it’s less important, it’s not.

(7) You can have it all. Whatever ‘all’ – in your definition – looks like.

Whether it’s Michael’s example of a new and gorgeous home, sizzling New York City friendships, 16-month old Jake, and a fully-engaged team of Vice-Presidents in the business…

Or Milana’s life with 2 grade-school children, over 17 product lines built with as many partners, and a significant six-figure business on a seriously part-time income…all starting from scratch as a young woman from the Ukraine…

Your definition of ‘all’ is possible…through collaboration. But why is this on a list of lessons I (most) hope we taught at the conference?

Because I hope we brought home this one small distinction – you get to choose exactly what it all looks like, there is no ‘one right way.’ For better or worse, you have to (get to) stand up in leadership on this one.